Notes to the actor: I play I
A concrete poem.
At the heart of my approach to acting lies this seemingly simple phrase that encapsulates a philosophy of performance that emphasises authenticity, presence, and the integration of one's whole self into the acting process.
The phrase itself is a concrete poem, where the visual arrangement of the words contributes to its meaning:
I play I
In this arrangement:
The first "I" represents the actor's authentic self.
The word "play" sits in the middle, embodying the act of performance and the spirit of playfulness central to my philosophy.
The second "I" represents the character or the transformed self within the performance.
This visual and conceptual structure encapsulates several key ideas:
Duality and Unity: The two "I"s suggest both the duality of actor and character, and their ultimate unity in performance. They are separate yet connected through the act of play.
Transformation: The space between the two "I"s, filled by "play", represents the transformative process of acting. It's the bridge between the actor's self and the character.
Continuity: The repetition of "I" emphasises that the core self remains constant, even as it adapts to embody a character. This reinforces my philosophy that the actor doesn't become someone entirely different, but rather extends their authentic self into the role.
Symmetry: The symmetrical nature of the phrase suggests balance - between self and character, between internal experience and external expression.
Simplicity: The brevity and simplicity of the phrase mirror the idea that great acting, at its core, is not about complex techniques but about authentic presence and play.
Process: Reading from left to right, we can see the process of acting - starting with the self, moving through play, and arriving at a transformed (yet still authentic) self.
Reciprocity: The phrase can be read forwards or backwards, suggesting the reciprocal nature of acting - how the character also influences and potentially transforms the actor.
To expand on this concept, I play I encompasses several key ideas:
· "Being, not seeming": I don't attempt the impossible task of becoming someone else entirely, but rather aim to be authentically present within the text (the character and the circumstances).
· "The self as instrument": I ‘play’ myself as if I were a finely tuned string instrument, capable of producing a wide range of tones and emotions. (Contained within this idea is the acknowledgment that I must practice my skills-work consistently!)
· "Inhabiting, not imitating": Instead of trying to imitate an idea of a character, I fully inhabit the role, allowing it to become an extension of myself.
· "Self-revelation through character": The process of embodying a character becomes a means of revealing and exploring aspects of my own authentic self.
· "The actor as authentic vessel": I serve as a genuine conduit for the character's experiences, emotions, and journey.
· "Bringing yourself to the role": I integrate my own lived experiences, emotions, and understanding with the text and the character's given circumstances.
· "Character as extension of self": Rather than seeing the character as separate from myself, I view it as an extension of my own being, shaped by the script's circumstances.
· "Honest presence in imaginary circumstances": I strive to be truthfully present and responsive within the fictional world of the story.
· "The actor's true self in action": My performance is a dynamic expression of my authentic self, activated by the character's situation and needs.
Crucially, this approach embraces the core notion of 'play' - emphasising that acting is fundamentally about playfulness, imagination, and the joy of creative exploration. It allows me to bring my full, authentic self to each role, creating performances that are grounded in genuine human experience while still inhabiting the world of the story. The result is a synthesis of the character's given circumstances and my own lived experience, producing a performance that is both true to the text and deeply personal, all while maintaining a sense of play and discovery.
At the beginning of my career, I stumbled upon this idea when I found that my most successful performances occurred when I'd been too tired to care - too tired to mask up, to protect my ego. (I guess I'd been too dense to learn the lesson from my teachers at uni.) In these moments, I discovered a state of complete acceptance: of my whole self, all the current circumstances, and all the text. This state of being is characterised by:
Complete vulnerability and non-judgmental awareness
No desire to control what happens or how it happens
A sense of being a free instrument, where skills training can be put into play without conscious thought
A pure readiness to play and explore within the given circumstances
While I initially stumbled upon this state through exhaustion, I've come to understand that this same level of deep self-acceptance can be cultivated through consistent practice. By regularly engaging in exercises that foster vulnerability, presence, and self-acceptance, actors can learn to access this state of openness and readiness at will, rather than relying on chance or physical exhaustion. This practice becomes an integral part of an actor's preparation, allowing them to consistently bring this level of authenticity and presence to their performances.
This approach requires a deep level of self-acceptance and a willingness to be seen in all one’s humanity. It's about dropping all pretences and allowing oneself to be wholly present and responsive in the moment.
In essence, I play I is not just a philosophy, but a concrete representation of the acting process itself. It serves as both a conceptual framework and a meditative focus, encapsulating the essence of my approach in a form that's both simple and profound. This visual and structural dimension adds depth to the philosophy, making it not just a concept to be understood, but also an image to be seen and felt - a constant reminder of the transformative power of authentic, playful presence in acting.